Cheese Before Bedtime

So I need to make the “About” post move down so it is no longer at the top of my Blog…and the last hour or so seems partially worth writing about, even though I was asleep for most of it.

So I was with three friends from the UK  in a house in the woods, and we had all rented sports cars, we wanted to drive through the new forest in a convoy, I had a pagini zonda, while my friends had a lamborghini, and a BMW…anyway eventually it was time to drive them, we all pulled out very slowly and carefully, however my car was now a TR7. Upon pulling out I clipped a wall, then driving at about two miles an hour I tried to drive down a curb into the road…suddenly the curb was 10 feet high and my car did this slow motion roll but landed right side up and was OK, so I got out to make sure no one eles did the same thing. Waving frantically one of my friends tried to turn round but fell off an even higher edge rolling his car multiple times…he was also OK. I looked at the damage on the TR7 and wasn’t too worried because the paint layer was actually just sitting on the frame like a skin / item of clothing, which could just be lifted off and swapped for a new one.

So after a while we pulled up in a car park next to some old cars from the 1920’s. Monkeys suddenly jumped out of them, laughed, disappeared followed by their cars exploding with bright yellow cartoon drawing of dynamite sticks appearing in the centre of the explosion. Clearly this was a ploy for monkeys to try and damage our cars more.

It turned out that we were actually at the site of an old Monkey Show place where monkeys would entertain all comers with who knows what. I knew the I or one of my friends had been responsible for its fate back in the 1920’s and what we were seeing was actually not real, but a haunted old building. Venturing inside knowing how angry the monkeys were I then saw a couple standing in corridor after the foyer.  The man was telling the woman how much he loved her, he got on one knee and then selected a song from the jukebox it was stairway to heaven. then as they spoke, Vincent Fernier walked in (Alice Copper) wearing a suit, which made me realise that if this was the twilight zone he would be the guy narrating it, before I realized what had happened, stairway had morphed gently in to I Love the Dead (by Alice Cooper) and I thought it was cool that they’d put his song in the TV show, even though he wasn’t playing as Alice.

We went outside together, however when I looked back this was my house in the mountains protected only by a fragile wooden fence. He told me something about how my house was going to be haunted for a little while, and that many bad things were coming. We walked over to a vista, the sound of drums building up (awesome 1970’s classic-rock drums) I looked over the vast misty rain forest ahead of me and saw a 600 foot tall Jar Jar Binks sitting at and equally large drum kit playing away. He stood up but the drums carried on, “ah they made a mistake in the editing” I thought. Then I looked to the left to see there was another Jar Jar who had picked up the beat on another drum kit…this carried on until I could see about 7 of them…

Lara Croft was suddenly there, which reminded me I should probably buy the new Tomb Raider game, she had a pistol, and was talking to someone about selecting targets (this was a long way from me, but I could clearly see and hear everything because this was a cut-scene) She then spawned in to the level / TV show / my house or whatever it was on to a raised platform just in front of us. Vincent now had a rocket launcher, it was as if he knew this was going to happen, I thought he was telling me about the evil Jar Jar’s so he could help me. No he just blew Lara up…I thought to myself well that’s weird, but not as bad as the dream I had before this where I was fighting against going to prison for three months because I used a TV source selector box incorrectly….

So yes that was the dream, it was over and I lay there thinking I should probably wake up, then when I opened my eyes I heard a dramatic musical sting…like the ones in batman when they reveal the villain…the thing was I really heard it, this was real. Then I heard what I thought was someone plugging in a phone and that freaked me out so I jumped out of bed…the phone was just a message being received…but the mysterious music heralding my entry in to the day with dramatic orchestration?…who knows (I suspect it was someone in another flat but the sound just carried weirdly well)

Still dazed from the crazy dream and the dramatic wake up moment I opened the fridge to get out the milk, woh! there something on the top of the milk…argh shake it off…it must be a piece of lettuce… but no, on closer inspection it was a dead gecko, he must have hoped in to the fridge, or been hiding in something I put in the fridge…but now he was sadly no more than chilled foodstuffs. So yeah my dream was really crazy, but my waking moments managed to help blur the edges of being asleep and being awake…and now I just feel terrible about the gecko (and the fact I probably have to throw things out from the fridge) but mostly the gecko.